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Saturday, May 21, 2011

Well Hello There My Lovelies!

So as you can see, I have a few donation gadgets on my blog. These are all charities that are very close to my heart. Especially the To Write Love On Her Arms Foundation. I myself struggled with depression for many years, as well as many people very close to me. It is hard for me to tell this, but i feel it needs to be said. I want to help others with their depression and cutting, so I will share my stories.

When I was ten, my aunt passed away from cancer. She was more of a mother to me than an aunt. I was with her on the bed when she took her last breaths. I was holding her hand when she left. I tried to give CPR, but it was of no use. The nurse came in and took me away. This was what truly set off my depression. After this incident, I attempted to hang myself. The next day, I woke up in the hospital. As it turns out, my cousin found me and they were able to revive me. From then on, I started cutting and burning. My body has numerous scars. wrists, forearms, ankles, thighs, ribs, hips and a few other places. I have gotten help now, and no longer struggle with cutting and burning, but I would like to help people see that life is truly beautiful and it is worth living for, and there are more ways to take out anger and sadness than harming yourself.

If anyone, and I mean anyone needs help with this struggle, feel free to email me. I want to hear your stories and try and give you help.

So, my dearest followers and friends, lets help make a difference in this world and do a bit of donating! I don't ask for much, just for you to be open hearted and optimistic, and take care of yourself, loved ones, strangers, and our beloved world

Lots of love, Cupcakes N' Cannonballs, A.K.A, Emily.

Amazing Cover...and This is Done Pre-Record Contract too!

video

The Raptors are Coming!

Oh...wait...I misread the billboard. The rapture? hmm... well I highly doubt flame filled world wide earthquakes will start tonight at six. Honestly, its just another one of those crazy antics like when they thought the world would end in 2000.

Friday, May 20, 2011

A Very Sad Day

So today, I lost a very dear friend of mine. Not a person, but one of my dogs. He was my boy, I had him since I was three. He was 13 years old, and fairly healthy, but I guess it was time for him to go. I was home alone and went to go check on him and my five other dogs and there he lay, motionless in his bed. Today, i burried my best friend :'(

I love you and miss you Taz, your forever in my heart.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

is there a lost and found for hearts someplace?

It seems that maintaining a healthy relationship in high school is impossible. In my whole school, there is about three couples that have lasted a year+. I always find myself helping my friends with their relationship situations. Everything from advice to the sex talk, they come to me. Just recently, there has been what seems to be a plague of breakups around the school. I, myself was a victim. I had been dating a guy from another school up until Friday of last week. On Friday, I was having a girls night with three of my best friends, when i got the text. After the text came the call making sure i got the text. In the text, he confessed to cheating on me multiple times. Ouch. Not even five hours later, whilst checking my face book, I stumbled upon his new relationship status in my news feed. That bastard is now dating a FORMER friend of mine. Also in the breakup text i received he stated i was too "weird" for him, and that he needed to be single for a while. Weird? The girl he is dating now has half blue and half white hair, she changed her face book name to the name of a Japanese singer, and is overly obsessed with Japanese people. And single? In the words of Chicago's cell block tango, single my ass!

But any how, back to the said "plague" of breakups at my school. A close friend of mine was dating my second cousin. Today I took a long walk with my ex, and best friend as I snapped a few pictures for art class and we chatted about relationships. When i returned home, I checked my face book and the first thing i see on my news feed is that they broke up. This guy was her first love. She had her first time with him. She would do anything in the world for him. Shes completely devastated about this breakup. Back to my walk with my ex, we walked and talked, and things felt like the good old times. It was a gorgeous day, and I was happy to be walking along side him. We talked about  our former relationship, that both of us still cling onto a bit. I still have feelings for him, but I'm not sure how he feels about me. I'm too nervous to ask. I think he does, but I will save the asking for another day.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

wednessday may 4th, 2011 : a random journal script

I see you from across the room,
My heart once broken rises one thousand miles.

Your smile makes me weak in the knees and i don't know what to do,
You pull me close,
But its not the same,
As when you used to whisper "i love you"

This time last year,
It was you and me.

Now our eyes meet,
And i don't know what to do,
Because all i want to do is kiss you and whisper i love you.

But your with her now,
I always sit and ponder.
Just wondering if I'm ever going to get over you,
But I'm telling you now,
I don't ever want to